Hola amigos

[War Arrow]

I've been lurking around on this site for a few months and I've only just noticed this introduction thing. What can I say? I'm new to the internet and the weird and wonderful concept of sharing notes with people on the other side of the world.
I've already received a friendly welcome from a few of you so this might be a bit redundant, but anyway...
My principal interest (although obsession is closer) is pre-Hispanic Nahuatl culture of Mexico (Mexica, Acolhua, Tecpanec etc) which diffuses into anything that may have any bearing on the same. I've been attempting to compile a pedantically encyclopedic book on the belief system(s) of the time for the last decade or so. I've been sidetracked into writing a couple of novels (set in pre-Hispanic Mexico) but it's still all very much on course. My ambition is to set the world alight with my (theoretically original) ideas regarding curiosities like er... why a Goddess of childbirth (Chiconahui Izcuintli Chantico) should belong to the Xiuhtecuhtli complex of fire Gods. Okay. Probably not light reading but a guy at the British Museum seemed to think I had something. I'm neither professional archaeologist nor anthropologist, although I do read a lot and have a well-developed sense of my own importance.
I live in London, although I try to visit Mexico City on a yearly basis.
And just for the record...
I don't believe in UFOs. I used to though, when I was a gullible teenager. I'm not proud but at least I know my enemy.
I don't trust creationists, and nor am I a Christian, although I would argue that, within context, Huitzilopochtli, Quetzalcoatl (and the others) are culturally valid models of Deities in all senses that matter.
I have not, as yet, conducted human sacrifices.
I dislike smilies. You should be able to tell when I'm joking. Hopefully.
I have doubts about pre-Clovis migration, although I'm prepared to be shown the error of my ways.
My girlfriend is a descendant of Charles Darwin (and no-one was more surprised than me when she casually dropped that one into the conversation) so I feel compelled to take Darwin-bashing personally, as I'm sure would Tony Soprano under the same circumstances.
England is cold and wet and dark.
I feel like a bit of a charlatan adding my two pesos to many of the threads here, not that it's stopped me so far.
Anyway, it's a fascinating forum, educational and very entertaining. Glad I've found it.

[Starflower]

Welcome aboard, you are an interesting character and it's good to have new blood. (I do believe in smilies, I do believe in smilies, i do, i do)

Citlalxochitl(starflower)

[Minimalist]

Then here, Star...just for you.

[marduk]

ola amigo

I'd be interested to know your views on this beastie
Cipactli
think its just a myth ?

M

[Beagle]

I don't believe in UFOs.

It seems to me that there is some kind of phenomenon going on. Mass Hysteria? Hallucinations? I don't know. The phenomenon is interesting to me but I'm certain that it has nothing to do with archaeology. Welcome aboard!

[War Arrow]

The cipactli being a species of caiman, it seems unlikely to be a myth as the Discovery Channel is my witness. As for the question of whether or not the earth was formed from the bifurcated remains of a realy, really, really big alligator, well... scientists may mock etc. etc. (mumbles about being blinded by so-called facts etc)...

Having said (or at least implied) that, I'm sticking to my guns when Jehovah's Witnesses next knock on my door. So for anyone of similar leanings here. Yes. The world is a big alligator and the first dogs were made when Ipalnemoani punished Tata and Nene by affixing their heads to their behinds. Biology has yet to reveal quite why dogs should really be just human beings with their heads at the wrong end, but I'm sure the best people are on the case.

UFOs. Granted. There is something interesting about why so many people subscribe to the idea and remain utterly convinced of having experienced something, but as you say, this isn't really the place.

Once again nice to meet you all. I'll try not to post anything too gormless in the months to come.

[Minimalist]

This should probably go in the Joke thread but this seems more appropriate.

How to Get Rid of Jehovah's Witnesses
When you open the door and there's one there saying, "hello, I'm collecting for the Jehovah's witnesses...", interrupt them and say, "Great, I'm Jehovah. How much have we made so far?"


A chalk outline of a human body on the sidewalk, and a few copies of The Watchtower scattered around...


My mother (a second-generation atheist) used to say (in a very sweet voice): "I'm sorry, I don't give a damn about Jesus." Worked everytime. The Witnesses just backed off the porch in slack-jawed, bug-eyed disbelief.


Agreed, we are not prepared for this one, but it has to be carried off perfectly. The more sincere you appear, the more baffled the Witness will be: Answer the door with an automatic weapon and say "Allah be Praised!!!" and just see what happens.


Automatic weapons are undeniably the best deterrent to Witnesses. For extra effect, fire a few rounds into the air or towards their car. Pretend you hear a voice inside your head telling you to kill the witness. Guaranteed to stop future visits for several years.


The young couple came to my door. I was wearing my robe, and had just awakened. Now let me explain, I am a very unusual looking person anyway, but when I awake, I look like some kind of movie monster, I have hair all over everywhere. I made my eyes real piercing, and stared past them. I knew who they were, you can tell, they look so cute in their getup and their bland faces.Well the female one obviously is supposed to do the introduction because she sort of panicked, and said: "We're...we're...we're..we're....we're...." And then she stared helplessly at the other one and he said: "uh... uh.... uh... uh..."I then did a really fierce grin and stuck out my hand in a very fast gesture, and opened all my fingers, and in a voice sort of a mixture between Peter Lore and Lurch, I said: I... WILL... TAKE... YOUR... LITERATURE... AND... GIVE... IT... TO... MY... MASTER. The male one quickly handed me a copy of whatever rag they were peddling. they did not ask for a donation.They ran.It's a true story, and they never came back.


A friend claims that when Jehovah's Witlesses knock on her door, her first response is to ask for their address. When they ask why she wants to know, she says it is so she can visit them to push her beliefs. So far, none of them have given their address. It also marks the end of the interview. SLAM!


A guy goes up to my friend's friend and asks, "Can I talk to you about God?" She says, "Sure, what would you like to know?"


When JWs come to the door say, "Thank you, but I already have a religion but I'm not sure if it's legal in this country."


I answer the door with a bloody knife and say, "I'm sorry, could you come back in a half hour? We're not done with the virgin yet."

[War Arrow]

I did manage to scare some away once and without even trying. I'd had a late night involving lots of cold refreshing drinks, had slept with my clothes on (so I still looked like an undertaker) and was still feeling somewhat er... "refreshed" when I opened the door, somewhat palefaced too. "Yeeeeessssss?" I said, which somehow came out like Lurch from the Addams Family. The two witnesses just looked at each other and turned back up the path before I'd even realised what they were there for.
Lightweights!

[Minimalist]

Even Jehovah finds it hard to get good help any more.

[marduk]

I am on the local Jehovahs witnesses "do not call under any circumstances" list
if they ever call round just ask them what this thing is about YHWH flying here on a rocket chair from the Pleaides and watch them make their excuses and leave

http://www.bible.ca/Jw-changes.htm#JehovahOnPleiades

[War Arrow]

I am on the local Jehovahs witnesses "do not call under any circumstances" list.

There's a list!!!!!!
Please tell me you're not joking.