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Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 9:18 am
by War Arrow
dannan14 wrote:Advanced beer bong technology requires several peripherals. For example, say you are on a second floor balcony, but your friends are on the ground. You could simply attach a 14' hose to the funnel and proceed as usual. This would be a grave error.
Depending on the size of the funnel and diameter of the hose, the capacity of such a bong can be well over a six pack. This is an enormous amount of liquid to have forced into one's stomach at once and if one is standing at the time disaster (in the form of a cracked skull) may occur. Also, beer may be spilled in the process and that is of course a major no no.
The solution is obvious. At the bottom end of the hose one must attach a valve. This allows more control over the flow of the beer and will help prevent unnecessary spillage.
The remaining peripherals are just as essential as the valve. A crash helmet and a comfortable, reclining easy chair make beer bonging a safe and happy experience.
i hope this has been helpful and informative to those readers who have never had the opportunity to imbibe mass quantities of cheap, bad-tasting beer at great velocity.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I believe we have an expert in our midst. Sir, we salute you and your pioneering spirit!!!
Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 9:34 am
by Digit
Years ago, (pre marriage) my local pub used a similar technology to deprive punters of their money.
The punter, (victim) would be wagered that he could not drink a pint of beer through a coaching horn in several minutes.
He would be persuaded to lie on his back with the horn in his mouth whilst his torturer stood by, pint in hand
It is of course dead easy, all you have to do is keep your tongue inside the horn's mouth piece to control the flow of beer.
With the victim ready, tongue correctly place and beer at the ready, the victim was asked very kindly if he was comfortable? Would he like a cushion under his head?
As soon as he replied the pint mug was upended!
It wasn't a cushion that was needed it was a sponge!
Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 10:00 am
by dannan14
On one occasion, our entire apartment complex had a huge party in the parking lot. We were offering beer bongs to anyone who was willing to take them. One moron kept spouting off about how easy it was and how lame we were but he would do it anyway for the free beer. We included 4 shots of vodka in his bong full and he never came back.
Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 10:30 am
by Digit
One born every minute!
Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 11:35 am
by dannan14
Yes, that is unfortunate. Too bad more of them don't aspire to the Darwin Awards. If they did we would all have more entertainment resulting in fewer morons and lessoffs.
Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 3:18 pm
by Minimalist
I told you guys. A freaking frat house!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/200 ... ovedtosing
Ancient hunters painted the sections of their cave dwellings where singing, humming and music sounded best, a new study suggests.
ADVERTISEMENT
Analyzing the famous, ochre-splashed cave walls of France, the most densely painted areas were also those with the best acoustics, the scientists found. Humming into some bends in the wall even produced sounds mimicking the animals painted there.
Complete with booze and broads. What more could a guy want?
Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 8:12 pm
by rich
Then why did they leave?
Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 5:54 pm
by Rokcet Scientist
War Arrow wrote:Minimalist wrote:I just don't think it's possible to have too many threads about this kind of a subject.
This is REAL archaeology.
Hear! Hear! (thumps table with fist and fiercely bristles moustache in support).
Can't you capture that with your built-in webcam on video, WA? Please? I, for one, would
really like see you "bristle your moustache"... How is that done anyway? Can you shoot it close-up at a super high frame rate please? Some extra backlight may 'spice up' and dramatize the image a bit. To make it a photographically interesting image. So that we get to see a long drawn-out slo-mo? Be reasonable: we need a laugh too, every now and then!
Happily I am able to report that the internet proves to be a cornucopia of research material, this short film for example which appears to capture an experiment aimed at determining the optimum strategum applicable for beer bong technology when used in conjunction with a person (or persons) of restricted growth. Truly, the more one learns, the more one realises how much is yet left to learn.
http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=b ... tesearch=#
Fascinating. Absolutely fascinating!
Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 8:37 am
by War Arrow
Let me see... now how do I work this thing?
Ah yes.
Here we go:
Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 9:08 am
by Digit
Where do you put the batteries?
Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 9:16 am
by War Arrow
Digit wrote:Where do you put the batteries?
None required. It runs off ley lines.
Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 9:27 am
by Digit
Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 12:23 pm
by War Arrow
Oh really... that's just absurd!
